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Liner Notes · No. 026

"Hot for Teacher" by Van Halen: the B-side

Branded HallPass pop-up card for Van Halen, Hot for Teacher, 1984, with a pop-up fact bubble

Quick hall pass: the song that got you sent to the principal's office for air-drumming on your desk ended up on network TV, in a video game your kids still can't beat, and on Roth's set list in 2026. Here's the B-side.

On this record

TRACK 1 · The cameo

Glee and Guitar Hero

Glee dropped it into a fantasy 80s classroom in 2011, and Guitar Hero made it one of the series' harder songs. Five buttons. Still too many.

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The detention scene: On November 15, 2011, Glee's "Mash Off" episode, billed as the show's 300th musical performance, put the song in a fantasy classroom with a full 80s takeover. Rachel questioned whether the song was appropriate. Correct, Rachel. The kids in 1984 were asking the same thing, mostly so they could hear it again.

The excuse: The singer's explanation for picking it: he's a Van Halen fan. Honestly, the most believable thing anyone said on that show.

The plastic guitar: It's in Guitar Hero World Tour and Guitar Hero: Van Halen, where it's a master track, and the Guitar Hero wiki calls it one of the series' harder songs. Reviewers counted it among the band's classics next to "Jump" and "You Really Got Me." Eddie made it look easy with six strings. Millions of us couldn't do it with five colored buttons.

That's the TV and the games. Now, who was at the mic in that classroom? Quiz time.

In 2011, which Glee character sang "Hot for Teacher" in a fantasy classroom?

No Googling. We'll know.

That's Side A. Flip the tape.

Side B is where it gets weird:

Free, every Tuesday. One song, the story you never heard, and a 10-minute hall pass from the doomscroll. Already subscribed? Enter your email to unlock.

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